Motherhood. It’s Just a Job.
I told myself I wasn’t going to write about this. In fact, I’m still not going to go over the whole story, because it’s actually quite stupid and not worth recanting.
I’ve actually been dancing around the subject all week, which is something I’m usually not known to do. Dancing, that is. I’m a walk right up and bust your balls woman, because it’s over quickly and we can all move on afterwards.
Anyway, to cut to the chase, I had a fight with a supposed friend this weekend. Not a disagreement about politics or a tiff about being ditched for dinner. An actual fight. Kinda a one sided fight, actually. The Offender was all hot on the titties about some bullshit or other that I actually didn’t care about. In fact, I was a bit amused by the ire in this other person because it was so completely ridiculous and over the top that I thought I’d just let them throw their fit until the fire burned out.
And then they said something meant to piss me off.
And it sure did.
“Like being a mother is just a job.”
The moment where another person actually has the balls to trivialize the life of your child and imply that your role as a mother is meaningless. As if it’s on the same level as being a dog walker or a librarian. Watch out, prickface, cause now I’m angry for real.
The fight itself really doesn’t bother me. It’s that comment and the implications in it that I have been thinking about over the past few days.
I have now been endlessly thinking about how totally and completely motherhood changes you to your very core. About how you carry this life in you for 9 months. You fucking make a human in your very own body. And then one day, you have some pain, and you swear at your husband a lot and threaten some nurses. And then a little while later, you see what you’ve created and you are forever bound to this life. Forever.
Your job responsibilities include: bodyguard, cook, maid, chauffeur, companion, nurse, teacher, playmate, entertainer, and all other duties the child sees fit. You sacrifice all things about yourself and set aside anything that gets in the way of the best interest of your child.
Your overwhelming love helps you get through those tough days of exhaustion and insanity. You spend endless moments trying to catch your racing heart every time you think something may have hurt your child. You miss out on social activities because you cannot bear to spend so much time away from them.
You know what it means to be completely selfless.
And for someone to imply that any of those things is even in the same universe as any job that pays you to show up is a total fucking imbecile. Asshole. Moron. Piece of shit. And no friend of mine.
I’m so glad I got that off my chest. My tits are heavy enough these days without carrying any extra weight.
Motherhood has changed me. My Bestie told me that the biggest difference is that once you have a child, all the things you do are to facilitate the child’s life. And she’s right. My job is still important to me. But mostly because it allows me to care for my child.
She’s one smart cookie, that Bestie.
So the next time you fight with someone, rest assured that there is one topic you should keep your trap shut about. We’ll call it “The Abyss”. Because once you go down that road, there is no turning back. Some things are never appropriate to put on the table. Ever.
There endeth the lesson.