It’s Awesome To Be Me

by Cookie

I don’t have time for a real post today.  I have to go do a second round of testing for gestational diabetes, after failing the screening last week.  Otherwise known as going to my doom.  The thought of a restricted diet makes me want to cry and then induce labour, so wish me luck, bitches.

But I’ll take a quick second to let you know why its awesome to be me today.  Otherwise known as whinings of a pregnant whale.

1. I have 2 volunteer full time jobs:  One involves all the necessary slave labour duties of mommyhood.  The other involves acting as an incubator.  Growing humans is hard work!

2. I have 2 part time jobs.  They pay well and don’t usually involve the bodily fluids of others.

3. I hardly slept last night.  Of course because I had to get up early, am not allowed coffee or bagels or anything that takes the edge off my tired cranky self.

4.  My carpel tunnel was so bad this morning that between that and my sleep deprived state, I could not aim properly to get the toothbrush in my mouth.

5. No coffee. I know I said it already. I said it twice for effect, louder this time and more forcefully.  Not an accident.

6.  I’ve decided that any post I’ve written about peace and love and harmony is crap.  I fucking hate people, and you should too.

7.  The drink they give you to test for diabetes tastes like melted freezies.  You know you want some.

8.  Assholes People around me have gone from ” are you having twins?” to “When are you due?”

9.  There is no whiskey in my non existant coffee.  Three times.  I know.

10. My appointment is downtown.  Therefore i will probably have to give them my baby as payment for parking anyway.  So why bother with the test.  Ahh.  Coffee.