Motherhood Isn’t For Everyone, And That’s Ok.
I read this article over tea this morning and I have to say it struck a bit of a nerve. It’s a bit long, but it describes how many moms ( and dads too) secretly resent and hate motherhood.
And I don’t blame them one little bit.
Here’s the raw truth, no Facebook filters or sneak peeks into how amazing our days are.
Motherhood is the shits a lot of the time.
It actually really fucking sucks a good chunk of the time.
I can see how so many women are just not interested in participating in something that literally sucks the life force out of you and spits you back out in an effort to still be a moderately well functioning member of society.
Your whole life now revolves around managing unreasonable, moody, nonsensical tiny humans and keeping them alive every day. You are blessed with the task of trying to take these maniacal little dictators who push you to the very limit of your humanity every 90 seconds and turn them into someone who will not end up contributing to the general assholery of the world.
It complicates everything. You can’t just take a class, or go back to school, or volunteer your time, or make yourself a better human in any way without having to figure out who is going to step in and do your mom job for you while you are out making yourself less of a shit.
All while not sleeping, managing household tasks, cleaning, managing what’s left of your career and generally just trying not to fucking explode into one of the 17 directions you are being pulled in on a daily basis.
It’s not for everyone.
And like anything else, sometimes you don’t know that until it’s too late. And I can understand why some women just can’t.
Some days I feel like that too.
And yes. I know I wanted this. I know that I CHOSE this. I know that so many women can’t have children and probably hate everything about what I am saying. But Bitches.
Motherhood is really hard. And just because it was my decision to make this my life doesn’t make it go away and doesn’t take away my right to say so.
There is this nagging thing for me that makes it all ok. And that nagging thing is a love so strong that not only would I step in front of oncoming traffic to save my babies, but I would do so repeatedly, every goddamn day for the rest of my existence. I would sacrifice my own growth for them a thousand times over so that they can become twice the person I am.
And yeah. Sometimes it’s hard to see women around me doing all these amazing things professionally and socially and fucking just generally while I am at home trying to convince my three year old to eat his lunch and that licking ketchup off his fingers doesn’t count.
But I don’t care. I count my successes in smiles and hugs and successful trips to the potty. I can’t do it all and won’t try to anymore.
But for some of you out there that feel like you’re drowning and you wish that your life was something other than what it is……I see you. I get you. I could be you.
It’s not for everyone. But hang on if you can, and hopefully one day that will change.
And for the rest of us……find your people. Support your people. Don’t mom alone….there is strength in numbers!