World Breastfeeding Week?
by Cookie
www3.sainsburys.co.uk
This is OK too, you know.
Did you know that it’s World Breastfeeding Week?
I have a little bit of a rant about this. Maybe it’s because I wasn’t able to breastfeed either of my babies, despite my efforts. Maybe it’s because I feel like we don’t high five the girls out there who give up on it because at some point it becomes more about the mom and not about a thriving child.
Don’t get me wrong. I wish I could have breastfed. In fact, I tried like hell this time around. Everything short of attaching myself to a milking machine. Some people probably think I didn’t try everything then, and shame on me. But you know what? I have a toddler to care for as well as a newborn. My husband works long shifts. And at some point, I refused to cut off my nose to spite my face.
Here’s the reason why I feel a little Hot on my Tits bout this. As much as moms out there support one another in breastfeeding, whether it’s public, private, discreet, pumped milk, donor milk or whatever, there is not much mention of supporting those moms who feed their babies formula. When moms talk about it, they make it seem like it is the last resort, and that you are hurting your child by making this choice.
And I find that really fucking frustrating.
How is it that my doctor is supportive of my choice and even confirmed that nutritionally formula is almost the same as breastmilk these days, and yet all these moms out there can make me feel like such shit about it?
And not even directly. It’s comments like “I broke down and gave him a bottle in the end” after listening to their baby scream in hunger for hours when their milk was drying up that do it. As if letting them suffer because formula is poison is an awesome parenting choice too.
A generation ago, it was really common to be bottle fed. It’s not like we all turned out to be moronic monsters. Or did we?
Anyway. I support breastfeeding moms. I am envious of that ability. I applaud those who try hard and find success. I support the choices that we all make in order to care of our babies, but also ourselves. If you are trying to breastfeed and it’s not working for whatever reason, it shouldn’t feel like a failure. And if it does, I think it’s time to stop, because that’s SELF CARE. And we, as mothers, tend to be martyrs sometimes.
But you know that saying? “If Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy”?
If you aren’t taking care of yourself, you’re not doing your baby any good either.
So yeah. World Breastfeeding Week. How about World I Love My Child Week? How about World Women Supporting Women No Matter How They Feed Their Baby?
I just wish that sometimes, we knew how to be supportive of one thing without demonizing another.
And yes, I am a little jealous of the breastfeeders out there. I missed out on something special with my children. And if you think it’s convenient to have to make bottles all the time and plan how many to take to the park, think again. I wish I had the luxury of unbuttoning my shirt and providing for my kid. But I don’t. So please, please, please, be as respectful of MY feelings and right to do what what’s best for my child as you are all expecting the rest of us to do for you.
Rant over.
ihaveanopinionidliketoshare 
[…] 3. The ‘This is Sparta’ Award- Everything you say is powerful and strong. Agree or disagree I find your passion and convictions so inspiring. I would like to give this award to I Have An Opinion I’d like to Share […]
LikeLike
I had all three of my kids by ceasarian, and I am a bit sad about that, too. I would have loved to be an earth-mom, popping those kids out with no drugs and a couple hours natural labor. It was not to be. I’m happy for moms who birthed naturally, but I have to admit to some jealousy. Parenting is tough — the more you compare, the more you despair.
LikeLike
Wise words. Thank you!
LikeLike
We all benefit from pooling our information, though, thanks to all the mommy bloggers!!
LikeLike
Great post
My daughter couldn’t drink from me. I tried and all the nurses in the hospital tried too, my breast were public property for 5 days… It didn’t work and I am with you on the lack of respect we get for feeding our child formula. I fed her, kept her alive and helped her grow… end of the story. If I had relied on breastfeeding only, she would not have survived. I think that makes me a great mom! I also wished I could have breastfed her but in the end it wasn’t my call.
LikeLike
I totally agree with “bdh63” up above. I have been able to pull off BF’ing. It’s awesome. It’s also draining on so many levels. However, I did agonize about how to bring my daughter into the world (section vs. vaginal). I went the section route (for both) and encountered the same kind of venom and bile whenever researching it. I never even chanced a blog or Google search about whether or not to circumcise my son…
At the end of the day, you gotta do what you gotta do for your kids and your well-being as a mom!
LikeLike
I never had a desire to breastfeed, and actually couldn’t when my son was born due to being on medication. Even the nurses at the hospital made me feel terrible about not breastfeeding!! After all was said and done, I ended up thinking it might have been okay, but it wasn’t an option for me. They talk about how healthy it is, and how it boosts the baby’s immune system, but I have a friend who breastfed both her kids, and they were constantly sick. I figure it is always “to each his own”, but I do have to say it freaks me out when I see kids old enough to run up to their mom and tell them they want milk and then see the mom breastfeeding that two year old in public!
LikeLike
This one makes my brain hurt, and I’m pretty sure that anything I say will offend somebody!
I consider breastfeeding to be the optimal choice, and I think that people need to be encouraged to choose breast over bottle, all things being equal. I think people need more education and more exposure to breastfeeding, not in a sensationalist kind if way, but just in a ‘most common way to feed your baby’ way.
However, things aren’t always equal, and I think that a happy mummy is more important than either of the other options. There is no point stressing out over breastfeeding if it isn’t for you, for whatever reason. And that reason is nobody’s business but yours. I applaud women who make that decision for their own wellbeing, just like I applaud those who breastfeed. Where I struggle is with those who jump straight to a bottle with no consideration or attempt to breastfeed… But you can’t tell that by looking!
How about we have ‘keep your nose out of other people’s business week’?
LikeLike